Fuzzy Math Courtesy of the NEA

We keep a coin jar for loose change and from time to time I roll the coins and change them into paper money to use for a treat---dinner out, a movie, whatever. I have been eying the jar for the past couple of weeks and considering that a harvest was in order. Last night I got the coin sorter and the paper rolls out and started sorting and rolling. When I was finished I had $67 in rolled coins. I counted it at least 4 times to be sure--3 rolls of quarters, 5 rolls of dimes, 4 rolls of nickels and 8 rolls of pennies---$67 every time. We decided that we would add it to the Christmas fund. My husband and I are not exchanging gifts this year, but rather are giving to underprivileged families, and we would add this to the pot.

This morning I carried my heavy sack of coins into the bank to change it into folding money. The teller was a woman of about 35, no more than that. I told her of my mission and arranged the coin rolls into like groups so that her job would be easier. She began to count the money--"3 rolls of quarters, $30, 5 rolls of dimes, $25, that's $55 and.....uh... 4 rolls of nickels at $2 each, that's $8 and ...oh gosh, I can't add... uh that's $62 and 8 rolls of pennies at 50 cents each is $4 and the total is $66."

"No," I said, "That should be $67 because $55 + $8 is $63 not $62 and then the $4 in pennies makes $67." She looked confused, so I counted it out for her and showed her, again, that it came to $67. After the second counting, she agreed that I was right and sheepishly turned to her cash drawer and counted out my money...3 $20's and 2 $1's for a total of $62. She held the money out and I didn't take it. She stared at me with a "What's wrong, now??!" look and I said, "I'm sorry but the total was $67."

She mumbled something under her breath about needing coffee and retrieved a $5 to add to the pile and counted it out again. This is a bank teller who can't add and subtract simple sums in her head and make change! This is a bank teller with responsibility for complicated transactions. This is someone who has a cash drawer with large sums of money in it that must balance at the end of the day. This was an easy transaction, just count the money and then give me the same amount of folding money in exchange. God forbid that I had taken a large check that needed to be divided among three accounts and then had some cash back, too (something that I do regularly).

My bank is a well respected bank in this state that has been around for 40+ years under its present name and existed for many years before that. I might have to consider taking my money out now, before the run on the banks so that I can be sure that I actually get all of it!